Friday, October 12, 2007

Kelvin's Scottish Comments Are True!

For those of you who watched Question Time last night you would have seen Kelvin MacKenzie (right), quite rightly, have a go at the Scots. This enlightened man said that Scots enjoyed spending money but not creating it. I am here to say that what Kelvin said is true. The Scots are a bunch of lazy, freeloading twats.

For years now there has been more taxpayers money spent per head in Scotland than in England. This is because Scotland does not produce anything apart from kilts and bagpipes and they are not really internationally exportable.

And before you irrate Scottish wankers start moaning about the oil. Bear in mind that there is not enough oil to pay for the services you already have let alone make you rich. Also the oil was found by the UK and not Scotland therefore it belongs to the whole of the UK.

As we all know most Scottish people are unemployed and what Scots do all day is drink lager in their stringed vests and sit on their dirty broken settees watching television. I think it is about time we stopped giving money to the freeloading Scots and make them get off their arses and work.

Kelvin MacKenzie also warned the British public last night that Gordon Brown is a socialist Scot who wants to spend every penny you earn. However the response from the ignorant Cheltenham Question Time audience was to boo him. Now I found that disgraceful because what that audience forgot was that Kelvin was absolutely correct. For 10 years now Gordon Brown has just taxed, taxed and taxed again and nothing will change now he is Prime Minister.


Anonymous said...

Well lets examine what McKenzie said. He said the Scots were not entrepeneurs. Perhaps the best known entrepeneur in history was Andrew Carnegie (from Dunfermline). Perhaps you haven't heard of Sir Tom Farmer, Sir David Murray, Tom Hunter.

Real creation of wealth however comes from invention and innovation

The average man in the home he calls his castle, slips into his national costume - a shabby raincoat - patented by Chemist Charles Mackintosh from Glasgow, Scotland.

En route to his office he strides along the lane, surfaced by John Macadam of Ayr, Scotland.

He drives in a car fitted with tyres invented by John Boyd Dunlop, Veterinary Surgeon of Dreghorn, Scotland.

At the office he receives the mail bearing adhesive stamps invented by John Chalmers, Bookseller and Printer of Dundee, Scotland.

During the day he uses the telephone invented by Alexander Graham Bell born in Edinburgh, Scotland. At home in the evening his daughter pedals her bicycle invented by Kirkpatrick Macmillan, Blacksmith of Thornhill, Dumfriesshire, Scotland.

He watches the news on T.V. an invention of John Logie Baird of Helensburgh, Scotland and hears an item about the U.S. Navy founded by John Paul Jones of Kirkbean, Scotland.

Nowhere can the man turn to escape the ingenuity of the Scots. He has by now been reminded too much of Scotland and in desperation he picks up the Bible, only to find that the first man mentioned in the good book is a Scot - King James VI - who authorised its translation. He could take to drink but the Scots make the best in the world.

He could take a rifle and end it all but the breech-loading rifle was invented by Captain Patrick Ferguson of Pitfours, Scotland.

If he escaped death, he could find himself on an operating table injected with Penicillin, discovered by Sir Alexander Fleming of Darvel, Scotland and given Chloroform, an anaesthetic discovered by Sir James Young Simpson, Obstetrician and Gynaecologist of Bathgate, Scotland.

Out of the anaesthetic he would find no comfort in learning that he was as safe as the Bank of England founded by William Paterson of Dumfries. Scotland

I'm not sure how many of the above were lager drinkers, vest wearers or freeloaders. I'm not sure if they ever sat on a broken setee. I suspect though that most of them were far too intelligent to be Conservatives.

Anonymous said...

Tell you what mate, your blog is gaining fame and noteriety. People are linking to it and saying "look at what this semi-literate twat has written".

Scottish Toryboy said...

First anon,

A wonderful post. I assure you that the idiot behind this blog doesn't represent the modern Conservative party. This blogger is stuck firmly in the past with the likes of Tebbit etc.

Anonymous said...

I can't believe I've just read this crap, has this guy ever been to Scotland?

Anonymous said...

Hear Hear Lionheart! You are absolutely correct. Scotland is full of Rab C. Nesbitts. Bunch of lazy, unemployed, alcoholic losers.

Anonymous said...

That's as preposterous as claiming that England is full of ignorant right wing, populist scum like McKenzie, which of course it isn't.

Anonymous said...

Ah well, at least we're good at the fitba! Come on!!! 3-1.

The truth is what Mr MacKenzie said is partially correct - Scots' entrepenurial spirit is less than it used to be and many people would accept a well paying, but meaningingless, job with the council. This could also apply to the North of England too.

Scotland receives more expenditure per head because we have a lower population density, and more islands etc. so you have more government expenditure to maintain communications links.

We were also hit harder when industries in the Western world went into decline as Scotland relied heavily on shipbuilding and so on in the past. So now we need to spend more on benefits per head.

I still reckon parts of North England have higher rates of spending per head than Scotland does as a whole.

And the South generates more wealth because not only does it have the capital city London, it is also the financial capital of the world and the LSE is more important than the NYSE now.

Naturally the wealth would flow from the capital to surrounding areas.

To sum up, I think there are many factors that explain why Scots are more dependant on 'non-jobs' propped up by government expenditure now and that is our social mobility has ground to a halt. We don't have Grammar schools etc. like England does.

Steve said...

The last anonymous comment is actually a very good comment. And explains a lot. Unlike the first anonymous comment which to be honest is naive and ignorant.

Anonymous said...

Kevin MacKenzie seems to have stirred up a hornet's nest which is probably what he wanted. He obviously is well behind Alex Salmond and his mates trying to get rid of the Union. Does that mean MacKenzie is a paid up member of the SNP or the National Front maybe?

George Reagan said...

The last anonymous comment is absolutely ridiculous. Obviously you are a far-left liberal hippy who can't handle the fact that there are people who (quite rightly) disagree with you.

hairmonster85 said...

message for the authoritarian fuckwit who wrote the blog: rab c. nesbitt wasn't a fucking documentary.

Anonymous said...

Neither is Fahrenheit 9/11

Lionheart said...

Dear Hairmonster85

You obviously have not seen the news this week about how the Scots are using English money to abolish their prescription charges. This is just another example of how the Scots like to spend money but not create it.

The Fish Maighstir said...

Is that good enough for you?

Ok, ok, one more!

Where are your figures, by the way? hmm?
Maybe we can have these silly hate-mongers silenced once and for all now? Although, I'm certain these facts won't appear in the sort of newspapers you read! I wonder if, once Scotland gains independence, people like this guy will continue to blame his miseries on the rest of us, English, Scottish or whoever? I kinda hope he does in a way, as shooting fish in a barrel can be quite relaxing sometimes!

George Reagan said...

If Scotland gets independence I will buy a big tub of popcorn, sit back and watch as Scotland goes down the drain in a mountain of debt. And where are your figures? If you truly believe Scotland can survive on its own then PROVE IT!!!

Lionheart said...

George Reagan is absolutely correct. Also I have taken a look at the websites supplied by The Fish Maighstir and find that they are nothing more than lies. When it comes to oil even the far left Guardian newspaper agrees with us when we say that Scotland can not financially survive on the revenue from North Sea oil.

The Government Expenditure and Revenue in Scotland (GERS) stated that public spending in Scotland in 2004-05 was £47.7bn whereas revenue is only £36.4bn. That is a deficit of £11.3bn. North Sea oil revenues would amount to £5.2bn a year but that still means an independent Scotland would be in deficit by £6.1bn. Now The Fish Maighstir as a nationalist you may dispute the GERS figures but few fiscal experts (in other words people who know what they are talking about) would dispute the figures.,,2008185,00.html

Anonymous said...

Mackenzie is absolutely 100%correct!

Apparently, the sweaties like socialism. Well that's fine for them, but then THEY HAVE TO F*CKIN' PAY FOR WHAT THEY WANT, not beg off, and steal from the English!
When are they going to grow up
and start acting like real men!!

Anonymous said...

Living in the Canada, I have now come to the conclusion that the English posters on this forum are not only pig headed ignorant, but are showing signs like Mackenzie of being mentaly retarded.

Anonymous said...

Man alive, not this “Englishman walking down the road invention list” garbage again. Can't let these lies go unchallanged.

Why the obsession with Englishmen? Are we the only ones that use the earth changing invention of a thermos flask?

"The average Englishman, in the home he calls his castle, slips into his national costume, a shabby raincoat, patented by chemist Charles Macintosh from Glasgow, Scotland."

Why the sneering reference to a castle? This is a proverb suggesting your home should be private and secure. This is an alien concept north of the border?

I had no idea we all wore a Mackintosh. I wouldn’t be seen dead in one, but then I never notice anyone else wearing one, so obviously I’m mistaken. Since when has a coat design been an invention? Should I list some world famous English designers?

Interesting you use the term “patented by…”. Is this an admission that the vast majority of supposedly Scottish inventions aren’t Scottish at all, merely innovations of previous inventions (usually English) or merely someone getting a patent in first. Example – the telephone, a French invention that BS ridden Scotsmen have been claiming for themselves for decades.

By the way, if England has a national dress, it isn’t a raincoat, it’s the business suit which (like our language) has taken over the world. Unlike Scottish “national dress”, tartan, which is Austrian and is used only for making tourists think you have a culture.

"En route to his office he strides along the English lane, surfaced by John Macadam of Ayr, Scotland."

If road surfacing is a Scottish invention I’m a Martian. Yet another example of an innovation being claimed as an original invention by Scottish BS merchants desperate to make everyone else think they’re somehow special.

"He drives an English car fitted with tyres invented by John Boyd Dunlop of Dreghorn, Scotland, arrives at the station and boards a train, the forerunner of which was a steam engine, invented by James Watt of Greenock, Scotland. "

Engines ‘eh! Who invented the steam engine, the internal combustion engine, the jet engine, the two-stroke engine? Englishmen. Another of modern history’s con tricks the Scots have managed is to make people think they invented the steam engine (Englishman Thomas Savery invented the steam engine – ten years later Newcomen “the father of the industrial revolution” produced the atmospheric steam engine – Watt was over 40 years later).

Englishman George Stevenson invented the train and Englishmen invented the tracks the run on the signals they use.

"He then pours himself a cup of coffee from a thermos flask, the latter invented by Dewar, a Scotsman from Kincardine-on-Forth. "

I’ll give you the flask!

“At the office he receives the mail bearing adhesive stamps invented by James Chalmers of Dundee, Scotland. “

Englishman Rowland Hill invented the adhesive postage stamp in 1837. More Scottish BS.

"During the day he uses the telephone invented by Alexander Graham Bell, born in Edinburgh, Scotland."

Hilarious. The French inventor of the telephone was in the process of suing the American Graham Bell when he died. Had he lived a bit longer, this myth would never have been started. Typical Scottish desperation to impress.

"At home in the evening his daughter pedals her bicycle invented by Kirkpatrick Macmillan, blacksmith of Dumfries, Scotland. "

Another French invention, is the bicycle. Perhaps this Scotsman improved the design a bit or something? You should bear in mind that only in Scotland does this constitute grounds for claiming complete credit.

"He watches the news on his television, an invention of John Logie Baird of Helensburgh, Scotland, and hears an item about the U.S. Navy, founded by John Paul Jones of Kirkbean, Scotland. "

Ahhh, the television. Baird was the first person to demonstrate it publicly, but he didn’t invent it. Like all complex items, is has had many contributing technologies from many inventors, scientists and engineers. Claiming Baird invented it is not only wrong but and insult to others, particularly the person with the strongest claim, Englishman Blumheim and the American Zworykin.

Great idea about the Navy, though! I bet nobody had ever dreamed up the notion of a navy before! Strange, but I thought England had the most famous navy in modern history.

"He has by now been reminded too much of Scotland and in desperation he picks up the Bible only to find that the first man mentioned in the good book is a Scot, King James VI, who authorised its translation. "

If you want to claim credit for that, you’re welcome. Anything under the reign of a monarch is now down to the nationality of that monarch, ‘eh? Interesting! Now what have the Candians, Australians etc achieved under an English monarch….

"Nowhere can an Englishman turn to escape the ingenuity of the Scots. "

I’ll make like a Scotsman and list a few GENUINE English inventions if you like. Blows this rubbish out of the water.

"He could take to drink, but the Scots make the best in the world. "

What a spectacularly arrogant statement! What drink would this be? The Irish invention, whisky?

"He could take a rifle and end it all but the breech-loading rifle was invented by Captain Patrick of Pitfours, Scotland. "

Indeed, out of all the innovations of rifles and firearms down the ages breech loading was a Scottish one when applied to rifles. The technology already existed for other weapons.

"If he escapes death, he might then find himself on an operating table injected with penicillin, which was discovered by Alexander Fleming of Darvel, Scotland, and given an anaesthetic, which was discovered by Sir James Young Simpson of Bathgate, Scotland. "

There are loads of types of anaesthetics aren’t there? Claiming 100% credit again for something that’s been around for ages?

"Out of the anaesthetic, he would find no comfort in learning he was as safe as the Bank of England founded by William Paterson of Dumfries, Scotland. "

What a hilariously contrived link! I hope whoever wrote this doesn’t designs on becoming a writer!

I have to mention the convenient Scottish definition of nationality here: someone you approve of who’s non-Scottish, thrash around in their family tree, if anyone can detect any Scottish connection – 100% Scottish. EG Blair when popular, Scottish; Blair when unpopular, English. For that reason alone you have to very careful about Scottish claims to anything.